Today as mentioned earlier has seem to be quiet the journey! However, the Lord continues to press in or so I'm learning! I am pretty sure if you looked at my life right now that it's like tug-o-war! I tend to forget whose I am but the Father doesn't! I have to tell you this semester has been a ride for me! At the same time its been such an awareness for me! Especially tonight as I was just briefly thinking about my response today along with the many things I've been trying to sort out. I never thought about this one but today I noticed how my emotions lock me down!
I don't know about you but sometimes if it doesn't make sense I tend to play detective thinking , " Ok, God if this doesn't work out ; whats your next plan?" That's a hard thing to admit because as much as you or I try to live out the light our flesh tends to crawl in. It's really a different season but it's one I'm thankful for because even when I look back into my Freshmen year of college. I can see where I didn't know myself but even now I'm becoming aware of patterns I've taken up. I never took time to just realize how much my Father loves me! And I have to ask those around me to forgive me because as much as I believe the Father thinks I'm beautiful! My flesh crawls in!
I mean I guess you could say some what I've let myself think if I make certain decisions in my outward appearance I'll be judged. I'm talking about pity stuff do you know what I mean sisters? I don't know about you but I find it easy to use a wall because I fear rejection!
Even though, I know I'm a lot more bolder then I would admit but like many of you I'm good at hiding my little light! However, among all this the Father has still kept chasing me! Especially tonight as I was reading Jeremiah 1! I mean the Lord told Jeremiah I am the one who puts words in your mouth!
Ouch! or I know for me because I know in reality I have made my choices but I'm also learning each day is a new day! The Father actually loves " Sponge Soakers", only He wants us to soak Him up more then they lies He fought for! I don't have this one down pat but I'm becoming aware! Thank God! He still chases us!
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