The Restless Orphan

 I found myself to be so restless these past few days. I have found myself forgetting what love actually means. I think sometimes we think we know what love is but we know so little. For some of us the image of love is a hug, kiss, family, marriage or perhaps a gift. However, it is deeper than that. Love is unconditional and a gift  also. Sometimes it's tangible and sometimes it's more of just keeping your eye's wide open. This is the love I have experienced in just a day or so. It's came in:

•  A text " I'll see you soon"
•   A prayer in that you'll experience love
• Mercy of knowing you can mess things up but it doesn't mean God won't work it out
•  Transportation for  my 1:8 Trip
•  A check to use for the summer.
•  A kiss on the cheek

If it is one thing I've grasped. I would say that  I am not God again! That sounds like it would be easy to understand. However,  I tell you I live in a complicated mindset and the only thing that untangles me is God. I am no more wise then the next person. I just keep asking questions.  I also must confess as humans we're scary people. In fact I have heard Beth Moore once say, " God knows it's scary to be us." I believe she has hit the dot on the nose. I have found that to be true with myself. I would look over myself thinking once or twice, " What is becoming of me?" I know the truth!
It has definitely been the shoes where what Paul's has said once, "  I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do but what I do I hate what I do  Romans 7:15." How, true that is is! So many times we want to over come our flesh and yet we try it on our own before coming to God.
 I have to say it's a wake up call for me because  I know that I naturally need to desire Him more than I do! That's where I want to be this summer!  So, I write one because I know  perhaps we don't have the same temptation but we all have the battle of the flesh!